Friday, 20 December 2024

Tomato Anxiety? Problem Solved

 

For years I assumed the tomato Tardis was a myth


There’s a time of year when tomatoes haunt my dreams. I have nothing against homegrown tomatoes, I love them. It feels good to saunter through the greenhouse and pluck and eat a ripe tomato.

But how swiftly that relaxed saunter morphs into a jungle expedition, where they all clamour for attention. We’re ripe! We’re ready to be picked! Ready for storage! Don’t delay!

Then it’s tomato frenzy. Tomatoes of some sort with every meal (or else). The surplus is frozen or stored until every corner of everywhere fills up. Things get fraught:

Where will the apples go?

Get some tomato sauce on those cornflakes!

Why did you plant so many?

Let’s make chutney. We’ll give away the surplus.

Yeah, right. We’re still eating 5-year old chutney and people send us Christmas cards that say: Happy Christmas, no more chutney thanks.

This can’t go on. Solutions are needed.

  1. Grow fewer tomatoes — seems obvious but I try this every year and fail. I wrote about it here.
  2. Find a tomato Tardis that can store a million tomatoes in a matchbox. I thought this was pie-in-the-sky, then … Bingo! I found one.

Our saviour is a fruit dryer. It removes all the liquid — that’s a lot. Pro tip: if you’re at a posh dinner and wish to come across as a sophisticated dainty eater, treat whole tomatoes as live grenades and steer clear.

A few days ago, I was fighting my way through this little lot with a machete. I’m now on the way to reducing a whole greenhouse to a single jar.

Happy days.

***

Originally published in The Haven


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